How Do You Express Your Love To Your Children?

I often wonder if we, as parents, have expressed our love for our children the way they had longed for. Have we been the parents that matched their expectations? We believe we have been good parents. We believe in providing them with everything that we think they need, and making them independent to lead a wonderful life. Is that all that is required of us? Where did we get this model from? Our parents? Perhaps! We look back and see how our parents have treated us when we want to give our best to our child. We absorb what we consider pleasant that our parents have delivered to us and pass it on to our children. We also make up for what our parents have not been able to give us, in dealing with our children. Sometimes we are too blind to analyze if our parents ever went wrong and pass on the happiness, and the hurts, downwards. In our eagerness to be the good parent we always want to be, we tend to overlook the key aspect of affection delivery, the one about how our children perceive what we give them. We need to have a finger on their pulse all the time and respond in a manner that makes their horizon grow wider as they grow up!

That is not an easy task. Parenting is full of challenges. It is a lovely experience if you learn how to manage them. We need to learn to express our love to them by discovering their favorite expression of love. This will help them connect to you better as they grow.

Expression of love is not all about hugging, kissing, cajoling and cuddling together. It is about connecting each other all the time. What really matters is how you behave to them as well as to the others (you are being watched all the time!) during the off times... times when no hugs and kisses and physical expressions happen!
How do we make this happen? Today’s working parents are really hard pressed for time. With a hectic work schedule we are not often able to spend quality time with our children. Even when time is short here are a few ways you can convey your love to them.

•Listen to your child: Have you ever taken time to listen to your children? When you listen to them, stop what you are doing. Turn around, and be with them. Give them undivided attention.
Look into their eyes as you speak to them. In case you are busy on the phone, you can tell them you will be right back.

•Bed time stories: Read out to them when they go to bed or anytime they ask you to.

•Converse with them: Can you enjoy a conversation with your child? Listen to them without interpreting, criticizing or questioning them? When you do so they become more comfortable to approach you. Just listen to them without interrupting them.

•Be there for them: They need to know that you are there for them. Be actively present in their lives. It will make them feel protected and guided. They will be confident to venture into anything. It’s a memory that will last a life time.

•Treat them: Go for an outing , an holiday, zoo , an ice cream, pizza hut, a drive... all these will show them how you love to spend time with them.

•One to one attention: Take time to spend time with your child. They enjoy one to one sessions. This makes them feel important. Like helping you in shopping, baking a cake, trying a new recipe.
• Be their biggest fan: Be present in their activities. Like sports, annual day, competitions. Show them how proud you are of them and their efforts they took. Cheer them!

• Smile, hug, praise: This will message them you are their biggest fan.

• Catch your child being good: Find reasons to praise them every day for cooperating, helping, getting good grades and so on.

• Show support in their interest and activities: sometimes they don’t match your expectation. Keep your disappointments to yourself.

• They need to know they are lived every day: With your words and actions treat them with respect and with love. No matter what, whether they do well or not, love them with no conditions. How you love them and treat them conveys they are lovable and valuable.